Dear Ulrika Jonsson

What began as a movie has since turned into an advertisement. I have found the creative process rather draining and have been working on the advert every day for the past fifteen years and am now on a number of tablets which I am not willing to list.

I just need a yes from you, an agent, some actors, an advertising agency, and some big wigs at various companies and we are good to go. Here is the script. Oh God, I hope you like it, I’m so nervous I don’t know what to do. I’ll be back in a bit, I forgot to do something.

I’m back, I’ve did what I was supposed to do. Anyway, here is the script…..

A Leigh Clark Advertisement

CAST

Mum (Ulrika)

Son (Me)

Daughter (My Sister)

Dog (My next door neighbour’s dog or a celebrity dog depending on budget restrictions)

Dad (TBC I am expecting confirmation any day now from Tobey Maguire)

ADVERT

Mum is franticly running around the kitchen.

MUM: (talking to herself) Being a celebrity, a doting wife and a mother of two troublesome kids is so hard especially when it comes to meal times.(to be delivered as franticly as possible)

SON enters kitchen on rollerblades along with DOG on leash

SON: (gasping, yet weak) I’m starving, what’s for tea mum?

CLOSE UP OF MUMS FRANTIC FACE

DOG BARKS

Daughter enters the kitchen holding a mobile phone (PLEASE NOTE this character will NOT be wearing a hat)

DAUGHTER: I’m so hungry Mum, hope tea is ready soon or I will like, die of anorexia.

CLOSE UP OF MUMS FRANTIC FACE

Dad enters the kitchen in a suit

MUM: (increasingly frantic, she says to Dad) Don’t tell me… you’re hungry?

Dad looks gobsmacked/awestruck depending on range of the actor

MUM FRANTICLY RUNS TO THE CUPBOARD AND OPENS THE DOORS AND BREATHS A SIGH OF RELIEF

CLOSE UP OF SOME TINNED SOUP (I am waiting for confirmation from various brands Heinz Big Soup is a definite NO!)

MUM: Thanks (insert name of branded soup here) you really know how to take the stress out of meal times my kids love (insert name of branded soup here) and both my husband and I eat (insert name of branded soup here) for breakfast, lunch and dinner as part of a healthy balanced diet. (She turns to her family and says…) Is (insert name of branded soup here) okay for everyone?

DAD, SON, DAUGHTER: (simultaneously) Hooray! (insert name of branded soup here) our favourite!

Mum then walks up to the family and they all put there arms around one another and smile whilst the Dog stands on its hind legs and takes a Polaroid picture of them. (CGI will be used for this part)

Closing Shot is of a tin of (insert name of branded soup here) and the dogs paw places the photograph against the tin of soup.

THE END