Katy Perry kissed a girl and America didn’t like it

 

Singing lesbian Katy Perry shocked the world with her hit single I Kissed a Girl because it was about how much she likes kissing girls. Katy is a one time Christian singer and her moral U-turn has created pandemonium amongst narrow minded American religious fanatics.

 

When the lesbian got to number one in the charts, crazed religious lunatics got whipped up into a frenzy so violent that they set fire to their own places of worship whilst still in them. Churches all over narrow minded America rapidly disappeared in protest against the lesbian anthem. “It’s okay, singing songs about kissing girls if you are a man but the first time I heard the lyrics to this song I sicked up my beef jerky and smashed my radio to bits with my fist,” said a lovely church goer. Following the mass destruction of America’s churches Katy Perry stunned the American public by announcing, “I’m not a lesbian really, they’re gross.”

 

A savagely burnt religious fanatic wept, “What the hell are we going to do now? Our churches are gone and our bibles are burnt to smithereens.” Katy apologised for all of the damage I Kissed a Girl had done to America, “Sorry” she said.

 

The riled religious freaks forgave Katy instantly and began working on their churches once more. “It’s really brought people together,” said an old anti-smoking pastor who was wearing a God Hates Fags t-shirt, “We would like to thank Katy Perry for pretending to be a lesbian because our outrage sparked a rebirth in our religious sensibilities and the building work has really brought together the communities. Our new churches are coming on nicely,” he winked.

 

Katy, who watched the churches being rebuilt with great interest held a press conference today. “I am a lesbian really,” she announced. “Ha! Ha!” she added.