Anthea Turner

Sometimes bad things happen to good people and other times bad things happen to Anthea Turner. Anthea Turner made a complete tit of herself on Hell’s Kitchen when her husband was ‘sacked’ (the poor mans version of being ‘fired’). Grant acted like he had just been given his last rights whilst Anthea sobbed like a discarded foetus on the kitchen floor. “Please… DON’T TOUCH ME!” she wept as Miss Dynamite went to console her. Miss Dynamite shrugged her shoulders and walked away whilst millions of viewers screamed for her to go back and kick ungrateful Anthea really hard in her babymaker.
There is never a bad time to watch Anthea nearly get killed. Better luck next time motorbike rider.

Dollar

God love these two. Dollar are the most deluded former celebrities in the world. They recently starred in Living TV’s Pop Goes the Band and underwent drastic surgery as a means to achieve the good looks they once had during the 1970’s. The results were hilarious and if you missed it I urge you to sit in front of Living TV until it is repeated.

 

Highlight’s of the show: David was being inspected by a female surgeon and when she attempted to touch his love handles he grabbed her hand and tried to force it onto his private parts. He has the sex drive of a fifteen year old boy with learning difficulties and should be imprisoned.

 

Another highlight was Teresa claiming that the lines on her forehead are due to her frowning whilst she’s hard at work in the studio. Studio? What studio? They haven’t had a hit single for 30 years and just watch them performing Mirror Mirror to their dance teacher – you will drown in a sea of laughter.

 

I had to stick Dollar in Celebrity Tits column because I had no other place to put them. But I secretly love you Dollar. I love you like a respectable aristocrat loves his secret stash of German porn.

 

Pop Goes the Band ad.

 

David Van Day proving to be a complete tit on GMTV

This is the best music video ever to contain an argument about a jacket

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